ALWAYS TEXTING ( 4eUrs )

4e urs


What is love ? What is grief ? She knew she missed him like nothing on Earth. Was that love ? Was that grief ? Thoughts like that occupied her during Ben's funeral and perhaps they kept her going throughout it too. Other questions filled her mind too....Why was he taken so young ? Why was he taken from her ?

Ben had been the new kid in school a few short months ago, joining her Tutor group in the Sixth Year. They had hit it off right away, they liked the same music, the same movies and the same books. Most of all, perhaps, they shared the same crazy humour. They spent as much time as possible together, he even walked her to school every morning, it had started as a casual arrangement by text, the phone beeped one night : Message from Ben : ' i wiL pik U ^ @ 8.15 xxxx ' She loved their walks to school together, always giggling about something or another.She would always tell him not to waste his money on texts but every night he would send : ' I wiL pik U ^ @ 8.15 xxxx ' . When they could not be together, the time was spent in texting each other, she was always sending him silly, soppy things ' U & me 4e ben wiL alwys b urs '........' wnt 2 stA lIk DIS 4e cnt W8 2 c U '. No matter where he was or what he was doing, Ben would always reply, until that evening, when her phone stayed silent, no reassuring beep..nothing. It was the next morning when she found out what had happened, Ben had been crossing a road near his house, after returning from a friends, when he was knocked over by a hit and run motorist and killed.

For days, she could not eat, could hardly sleep..it was a sadness that overwhelmed her and she could not belive that he had been snatched away from her.She thought she had read somewhere, that death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal and that was so true. All those questions which hurried around her brain on the day of the funeral remained unanswered.It was a great send off for Ben, all the school attended, yet she resented their presence intruding on her private farewell, she even resented Ben's family being there. A few of Ben's favourite things had gone in to the coffin with him....his MP3 player.....his Football kit......his mobile phone....a favourite toy from his childhood.

On her return from the cemetery, she went straight to her room, threw herself down on the bed and cried tears of pity, tears of anger, tears of rage until she could cry no more. The thought of Ben in his coffin was too much to bear. She picked up her mobile and before she realised what she was doing, typed out a message ' ms U so much ben wsh U wer hEr w me xxxxx ' and hit the add recipent button : Ben, and sent it. As the days passed, she sent daily texts ' i cry myself 2 slp ben ms U hun xxxx'..........' wiL nevr eva 4get U i M urs 4e xxxx '

The months passed and life began to re-claim her, she now felt able to get out and socialise and hang with mates again. Of course, she had not forgotten Ben, how could she but she was sure he would want her to get on with her life and try to enjoy herself again.

One night, a few more weeks on, she had been to the cinema with Jon from her class, he had walked her home and they stood chatting outside her gate for a while, eventually they said their goodnights and she came in and went straight to bed, tired but happy and it was a long time since she had felt that. Just before sleep took her away, the message alert on her phone beeped. Sleepily, she reached down for it. She looked at the screen with mounting horror, it read: Message from Ben : ' Y dun U txt me NEmor ? ' . She felt herself trembling all over, she knew Bens' mobile was buried with him.......then how ? Why ? It beeped again: Message from Ben : ' thawt U wer myn dun U wnt me nw i stil wnt U U wil c ' She hurled the phone away from her to the far wall, it shattered and phone, cover and battery all went their separate ways. She sat there wrapped in the duvet, still shaking uncontrollably. She looked at the remains of her phone and even as her eyes rested on the battery laying on the carpet by her desk, the fascia which was was laying a few feet away, lit up. Once again came that familar beep : Message from Ben : I wiL pik U ^ @ 8.15 xxxx ' .